Lemonade 101- The art of squeezing the best out of a given situation

COVID-19, LOCKDOWN, QUARANTINE, UNEMPLOYMENT, RECESSION, PANDEMIC, DEATHS, VACCINE etc. are various words casually tossed around like popcorn wherever we look. This is distressing and takes a toll on us emotionally. 2020 has exposed the ugly side of life to most millennials, a crisis nobody had thought we would have to endure in our lifetime. Well, let me tell you something that you already know, Life is full of surprises! All of us are sailing in the same sea in our different boats with our own quirks and perks. The sea is rough, but we are tough! Wow, I really cannot contain my inner poet now, can I? But on a serious note, that’s how it is supposed to be isn’t it?

‘A smooth ride is never fun’ is the catchphrase which my dad used to throw at me whenever I used to go to him with a problem and to-be-honest, I hated it. I wanted a smooth ride, where I could stretch my legs, relax and listen to some great music while I day dream. Road blocks, speed breakers and bumps annoyed me. However, life has a unique way of presenting you with what you ‘need’ instead of what you ‘want’ and the timing is almost always perfect. So just when the ride was supposed to get better, I slipped deep into a pot hole which seemed to be a bottomless pit at the time, and I was bolted upright from my day dream with a thud when I hit my rock bottom. AN UNPRECEDENTED CRISIS! That is how they address it these days, don’t they? A crisis I was highly unprepared to deal with. I called it ‘The ominous Karkinos’. So when this ‘ominous Karkinos’ came knocking at my door, I didn’t know if I should greet it or shoo it away. Nothing good can come out of this was what I thought back then. I was utterly clueless, scared and excited, all at the same time. I know it is bizarre to be excited when you don’t know how the future you had imagined and planned for, is going to pan out, but yeah! I was excited to take on this challenge which was so unlike me. Remember, a smooth ride, stretched legs and great music? That was how I always preferred it to be and here, I was rudely asked to slide my butt out of the comfort zone and face all the challenges that come along with having a human body. Little did I know then that it was going to be the best thing to have happened to me in my 26 years. Yes, life gives you rude shocks to get you going and you never know what can ultimately prove to be good or bad for you. So, I prefer not to label events/circumstances as good or bad. Let life unfold without the labels, its beautiful either way.

I believe the pain you go through in life is meant to help you grow so that you could help others through your experiences. Crisis hits us in all forms be it personal or professional and the process of its resolution is a journey in itself which is different for everyone yet it is the same in its essence. I received a masterclass on crisis resolution with a two-year long coursework from the university of life and I hope to help you all deal with crisis in your life with whatever little I have learnt.

So, what do you do when you find yourself sitting in a pile of lemons which life has just hurled at you? Well, you learn to make ‘Khatta-meetha Nimbu Paani’ out of it and beat the heat. Here, I present the lessons that I have learnt over the years.

1. Accepting and going beyond fear- The initial response to any crisis is always fear based. The self-preservation instinct kicks in and we fear losing out in life because we are uncertain about how and if we are going to end up on the other side of the tunnel safe and sound. This fear surfaces in us in the form of insecurities, anger, frustration and sorrow. In such a situation, it is of the utmost importance to be aware of all such emotions and address them well. A fear-based approach in life can never lead to rational decisions and outcomes. Often, we find certain crisis to be too overwhelming and we often indulge in denial or escapism as our coping mechanism, which isn’t a prudent approach either. So, what is the way you ask? Well, Acceptance! Fear manifests when we think too much about the uncertain future and various outcomes (which is anyway futile). So being present and accepting the problem the way it is without any drama is the first step. The crisis may seem chaotic at first, but having the courage to navigate through it all is something we all develop when faced with it. Also, this is a defining stage of the process because here we decide the trajectory of our journey. Finding oneself in a crisis situation can make one bitter or better. So, the kind of mindset we develop at this stage define various aspects of the journey for us. After-all, it’s all about the perception.

2. Clarity- Once we have the right mindset to tackle the problem, the next stage demands action. Real growth and transformation comes from action. We establish that it is our personal responsibility to work towards resolving the crisis and help ourselves out of it. It needs courage and determination and we all have a hidden reservoir of it inside us. Believe you me, you will be surprised to see the inner strength one develops when faced with a tough situation. I believe it is important to be a realist rather than an optimist or a pessimist. In life altering situations where we are unaware of the possible outcomes, we must be prepared to lose it all if things do not work in our favor or move towards a better future if things do work out well for us. That’s why having a clear mind is essential to tackle a crisis situation.

3. Managing the physical and psychological wellness- Crisis situations can be both physically and emotionally challenging. Often, we find ourselves so bogged down by the burden of the problem, that we disregard our mental and physical health. However, now more than ever, we must pay attention to our physical and mental health to better deal with the challenges. Exercising and consuming good content helps to ensure well-being. It is alright to seek help from others for material and emotional needs when we are going through tough times. But personally, I believe it is best to find a sanctuary within to rely on because we can find it all if we choose to turn inwards. Moreover, it is sustainable too as others can only help us up to a certain point, no matter how close or dear they are to us. So, be your own cheerleader. When I chose to turn inwards, I found faith, hope and immense strength to cope. I am sure you will all find it too. No one can care for you as much as you can care for yourself. Also, it gave me immense freedom to move ahead fearlessly, as I realized the ephemeral quality of all situations and relationships in life and how I can rely on myself in all such situations. I found freedom from self-limiting beliefs.

4. Patience and Flexibility- I cannot stress enough the importance of patience in life. One thing we all must understand that every situation is transient, even the pandemic. Learn from it while it lasts because the lessons crisis situations teach are far more valuable than those learnt during good times. It teaches us humility and delivers us closer to the truth. Life has its cycles too just like everything in this universe. Acknowledging it and being patient is the key to maintaining sanity. Being flexible and agile in our approach towards life helps us to embrace change without much friction. The more fluid I was, the easier it became to cope. Embrace the change. Realize that everything happens in its own time and we must respect that. Fussing over things don’t speed up the process, it only causes distress.

5. Give Back- It’s a journey meant to develop our character and strength. There is only to gain from it even if it doesn’t seem so at first. Make sure someone benefits from your gains as well. There is no joy bigger than giving back and helping others.

All crisis situations are blessings in disguise. These are the opportunities to gauge which parts of our personality are working for us, and which are not functioning well and needs changing. Remember, we are here to learn, rest assured? everything else is ephemeral drama.

After-all my old man was right; a bumpy ride will give you more than a smooth one ever will. The things you gain are more valuable than the things you might lose during the process. Hence, don’t take life too seriously, it’s only win-win here. So, while you navigate your way through the pits and bumps, make sure to enjoy it because life is beautiful and nothing is greater than just being alive!